I know I've talked about this before on my AOL journal, but I feel the need to talk about it again here, only because someone asked me about it today. I must get this off my chest again or I may just scream.
Why do people feel the need to ask me about having kids? Why do they feel the need to remind me of the "biological clock?" Why can't they just mind there own damn business?
For those idiots out there who insist on asking me...no, my husband & I are not able to have kids. Yes, we are perfectly happy without having any, whether they were our own or via a surrogate or adoption. We like our lives the way they are & enjoy the freedom our childless lives provide us. I am a month shy of 41 & have no intention of having kids now. If you had asked me 15 or 20 years ago about having kids, I would've gladly had one (or more), but the powers that be had other plans. If you had asked me then about going through all those expensive & sometimes painful fertility treatments without having to worry about the cost, etc, I probably would've accepted. But that was then & this is now.
Yes, I worry about who is going to take care of me when I'm too old and/or sick to take care of myself...who's going to take care of my earthly remains when it's my time to go...but I'm not, I repeat NOT going to bring a child into this world for that sole purpose. No, I'm not being selfish for whatever reasons you think I am. Wouldn't it be selfish to bring a child into the world only for him/her to play nurse & undertaker at some point? When I asked someone close to me about the meaning of life, she replied, "to have children." I personally don't find that statement very fair. Does that mean then, that my life has no meaning because I am unable to have kids & don't want them anymore? Does it make me less of a woman?
Please don't get me wrong here, gang. I applaud all of you parents out there, whether biological or adoptive! It's just not for me & after all the tests were done, it just was never meant to be.
Sorry about the rant & thanks for listening y'all.....................
PS Check out my sidebar every once in a while.....I'll be posting polls there! I already did one about pets, but I'm going to repost it since only 1 person answered it (thank you whoever you were!).
4 comments:
i wish there was one good, solid stock answer for those rude & tactless people who remind you of your ticking clock. there has to be something GRAND to say that will shut them up. unless you've already got it...? i am a mom, but certainly do not believe that the sole purpose of life is to have children. i'm sorry people hurt you in that way.
well, it was me who answered the first poll, and i said 'cat' LOL. you're welcome. tee hee.
i love you!!!!! phinney xo
I bet that is beyond irritating. My family use to ride me all the time about having kids way before I had my two little ones. If it wasn't meant to be, then it is what it is. Some people think you're not living unless you have children. I say if you're happy in your life, you're living. Plus...you get more sleep than the average parent.:)
To Hell With Them! The world needs more weird aunts anyway.
I don't have kids and I can give you a hundred reasons why. I learned from my mother early on that women do not have to have kids, it is not required. I feel bad for the people who want them and can't, but I also think there are a lot of people who have then and shouldn't. You will see the worst of this while working retail.
Non-breeders Unite!
Weird Aunts Rule!
Next time they ask, say "none of your beeswax!" Or something less polite. Always works for me.
If having kids is the sole purpose of existence then I guess that leaves me out in the cold too!
There WILL be someone to spoon-feed us our applesauce when we're 100. I know it. There are lots of us out here.
I think there is a way to be gracious when someone says something presumptuous or rude... but it is tempting to want to be nasty, that's for sure.
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