Sunday, October 19, 2008

Holy the heck did my boyfriend, Jason Hawes of Ghost Hunters, get in here? Is my blog haunted? Paranormal stuff going on in here? Don't tell Skip that he's here 'cause.....OMG.....I'd be in trouble! LOL

Anywho........I'm still here & getting a little better...just taking it day by day. I'm getting back into group therapy & having weekly visits with the therapist & shrink, hopefully by next week. Meds are in the process of being adjusted. All steps in the right direction! But friggin' winter is coming & I hate the damn winter. :::sigh:::
On an aside note ~ I've got an art blog if you want to check it out. I just need to remember to post artsy stuff I send & receive there more regularly. Just click here to check it out.

Now if this sore throat & head stuffiness would just go away.......

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Deep Breaths

"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful." ~ Buddha

Once again, I know it has been a while since I've posted. I've been going through so much........I don't know........inner turmoil lately. Lots of anxiety & panic over all sorts of stuff, especially work. I've not been myself. I've been depressed. I wake up every morning with the only things that are making me glad are Skip, Lucy (our dog), Stella (our cat)........& that I'm still alive......still.....sometimes.....I wonder.

There are days that I am absolutely terrified to go into work. There are times that I want to just stay in the Tarrytown area, where I feel "safe". The way I've been feeling/acting/panicking has not only myself, but others concerned apparently.

I need some time off from work to shake it all out of my head & get back to real life, but I don't know how long that is or what it means exactly. I wish I could go to Montauk for at least a few days to be alone where I love it the most & meditate by the ocean.

I don't know what to do for myself or feel anymore really...........